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Wednesday, December 7, 2011

I've been defeated by bread

Here have some non-sense from a sleep deprived pseudo-vegetarian with a kid with food allergies foraging for food in the snow:

So this morning I have both kids home sick from school, though I suspect they will both be going back tomorrow for the sake of my sanity largely but also because they are legitimately being little pains in my rear end today which is a surefire sign that they are on the mend.

So I decide in my infinite wisdom that we need to eat, and because my fridge is garbage I don't actually have any food in the house, they eat at my mothers or we eat out quite a bit right now because of this. So what I have in the house is a loaf of bread that I bought ohhhhh 12 days ago, not really great on it's own right?

So I'm doing mental inventory of "what I want" and "where do I have to go to get it", while lying in bed this morning and decide that the local organic foods market which is mostly a glorified vitamin shop that also sells organic foods and a lot of vegan options is a great idea. It's only a $7 cab ride each way, it has what I want (smoked tofu and vegenaise) and I'll be able to pick up some basic foods stuffs for the kids. But because it's an organic market everything is unnecessarily over priced right? Well anyway, I convince the two still slightly under-the-weather minions that if they'd like to eat today we're going to have to go out foraging for food and I shove aside my maternal guilt and lack of better support system (you'd think I could have thought of someone to come sit with them for 45 minutes while I went to pick up food, but sadly it wasn't going to happen any time before dinner hour and you can't NOT feed kids all day, they get kinda bitchy, not to mention that whole "neglect" thing annnnyway) so out we go by taxi in the snow to the health food store.

Now this is the part where I put aside my principles of "I will not buy milk/bread/cereal/produce at the organic market because goddamnit I AM NOT PAYING $4 FOR A FREAKING TOMATO!!!" and decide that if I want to avoid making small sick children walk three city blocks in the snow and wind and -14C temperatures to the normal reasonably priced grocery store that I will have to buy my essentials there and pay extra just this once. So I carefully budget getting my smoked tofu and a jar of vegenaise (which is vegan mayo, which I justify buying both because it's cholesterol free so good for my heart condition and dairy free which means everyone in my house hold can actually eat it) and yes even lettuce and tomato at over twice the price of safeway, and then tell the kids they can pick out some food.

Baby-spawn who's been sicker than sick this week immediately wants milk and cereal, so I cringe as I pick up the organic soy milk that at safeway is $3 less, and we go on the hunt for cereal. Well as it turns out much like you can't buy normal mayo at the health food store you also can't buy normal bread or cereal, they have spelt bread, rice bread, gluten free bread, oat and millet bread, honey and brown rice bread, but there was no such thing as just a loaf of good old fashion rye bread and I had almost a whole loaf at home so I wasn't about to pay $5 for bread I knew I wasn't in the mood for. We moved on to the cereals and realized there weren't any cheerios or rice-krispies style cereals priced under $8 for what looked to me to be about 4 servings.

And this is the part where I am extremely grateful that while we do have a dairy allergy in the household we do not have a gluten intolerance or wheat allergy. Thank you allergy gods for sparing me the torture of $12 gluten free cereals.

So with her big giant pleading eyes I relented and picked up an $8 350gram box of "Natures Path Organic Oaty-Bites" and we headed out into the snow to wait for a cab home. 

Well we got home and the kids both wanted cereal of course and I tried not to cringe as I poured out two thirds of the box into their bowls knowing there was a high probability they wouldn't even like the stuff and then coated it in a nice layer of organic soy milk and gave each of them a spoon. And surprisingly they each ate about 3/4 of a bowl full which for sick kids and new cereal is pretty good odds, they were quite happy and even if the groceries cost more than eating out it was nice to think we'd had a normal family meal at home for a change and I started forming a plan to bring whatever was left of the groceries tomorrow to my mothers where they will last for more than 2-3 days (damn you broken fridge you are the bane of my existence) and I set to work making my wonderful glorious sandwich. I open the bread that's been on the counter, and... oh no, no, please don't be moldy.

Fuck.

I look over at the kids, who are curled up on their blankets, watching a movie cozy and content and contemplate making them put on parkas and snow pants, hats mitts and boots and dragging them to the end of the street to the corner store for bread...

And then I make myself a cup of organic earl grey tea with organic soy milk and organic honey and pour myself a bowl of "natures path organic oaty-bites" and douse them with organic soy milk and sigh defeated by a $2 loaf of two week old bread.

We will meet again bread, and when we do, I shall have my sandwich!!!

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